I was in a dark spot in December. 
Why was that? How did I let my distance grow between me and God?

I was not sad about Pat's death....
Indeed it fulfilled me and stretched me in so many ways I never could have imagined.

Never would have imagined.

So was it Bev?
And in the house with such demons and energy attacking me? Yes probably.

But I know my defense.
I know I’m a child of God.
I know have total authority to be free and clear with a peaceful mind.

I went down over New Year’s and had a fabulous time at my church and came home and.... fell deep into a pit all alone. My birthday. Feeling like nobody cared. I knew it...  every bit of it.... was lies. I knew every bit of it was from Satan.
My love flowing to me from my friends is staggering.
And then of course the Love of all Loves, Jesus Christ is with me always

Knowing all of these things I could not figure out who I was battling when I would jump out of bed and sley demons. My leg hurt so I wasn’t exercising, it was very cold so I stayed in bed.
But I read the Bible. I listen to sermons I drenched myself in God. In the word.

So what happened to me?

Then, this sequence of a miraculous set of Events that Teresa helped me to remember:

She said girl just get down here to church. Drive down here tomorrow. Do it.
And I did but I didn’t really want to drive.
Didn’t really want to get out of bed.
Didn’t really know how to shake this off of me.
But it was perfect timing. Ruby could stay home with Bev.
It was overcast and cold and I didn’t want to get out but I could sit in my warm car and drive safely.

So I said OK.

Teresa texted me to say Pastor Locke was live. He was talking about accepting prayer requests and to type them in. You know I do not even remember what I typed in. But I listen to his recording twice and what I remember only is "to have the scales removed from our eyes." You really understand spiritual warfare.

The next day I drove down to church. I told Teresa that I had seen four demons right in my bed. One man with a bulbous nose. I opened my eyes and he was nose to nose with me as I laid on my side.
All of them were.
Then a little bit later young girl.
A little bit later another young girl.
A little bit later an older woman.
Like a family feud, like an entire family of demons was literally in bed with me. And when I told Teresa about it (and then subsequently completely forgot until yesterday that this even happened) my comment wasn’t so much that it was remarkable there were demons but just that I wasn’t scared. I kind of shook my shoulder and had no energy about anything. That is just not like me.

I get to church with Teresa there and I’m flat. I’m just flat no energy. 

Andrea did some deliverance and some work on me. 

I was shocked to know I had chest bumped through my demon of course, pushed Andrea. And Teresa told me that my demons were whining saying they didn’t wanna be here anymore because I was always yelling at them, casting them out. And one yelled at Teresa and I think pointed at her and said I hate you. You’re always praying!

(Now, I thought that was cool. This pure evidence that the demons hear the prayers. They don’t like it. And that prayers are effective. That was cool.)

And yet.

But I felt unresponsive. It felt like it missed the mark. It felt like I felt.

We went to have lunch and it was indeed delicious. Saturday night we just could not get a rhythm. I had nothing to offer as. I was just flat. I was in negative digits. That is just not like me.

We got up to go to church. And I cry and weep through church like I always do. I moved and I’m touched. Then after church I’m kind of down. Still. It’s overcast cold. I’m thinking maybe I should go home. But it would be stupid right? Stay and go to Deliverance service.

Deliverance service, my cough is so bad all day long all night. Felt like nothing happened again again again. I was just so negative. I was oppressed certainly buy these demons and could not shake it off. That is just not like me.

Monday morning Teresa has to wake me up because I took some kind of cough medicine. And I didn’t want to wake up. I did not want to do anything. That is just not like me.
When we left church and when we left Deliverance service Sunday we were unfulfilled. My negativity had spilled into Teresa. And she also felt unsatisfied. Nothing happening. So Monday morning, I didn’t really want to go back to church. I wanted to just drive home. Take all the poor me with me and go. That is just not like me.

Andrea had mentioned the negativity at her house and how she didn’t want it and it cut me like a knife. Of course she’s right. And all she was doing was flagging to shift it and change it which by the way I don’t understand how That’s

Different from burning incense.

But all that is to say I just felt like a big weight on everybody and I couldn’t shake it.
So I certainly did not feel like going back to church Monday morning but Teresa and Andrea had arranged to meet me there. To take care of me. I love me like sisters. And Andrea was trying to get Tai to work on me as well.  At first Andrea did some stuff and it just didn’t help didn’t move me. Didn’t touch me.
~~~ But Then~~~

Some demon came up after Tai looked deep in my eyes and scared me personally, I could see her authority. It was fierce. And even though I knew it was on my side, it was fierce. Then I disappeared and the demon came out and fought with her, yelled at her, spit at her. And Tai locked that demon seed it into place because the demon said she was going to hurt her. (I will have to ask Teresa the exact words there.)

And she told me that the demon said that Tai was lucky.... Because I couldn’t move to hit her or attack her. And Tai looked deep into the demon and turned her head like she does, very slowly from side to side, mockingly and said, "And why can’t you move?"  Establishing her authority! Again.

So inside of all of this was the work of principalities according to Tai and Andrea. And that the church was being up leveled and therefore the bigger demons, the iniquities, the principalities were being rooted it out. They were coming out. Next line and so Tai then called on someone else. A demon slayer.
And she came in straddled right over me and just started before we did anything or said anything. Very powerful. Well it turns out Ishtar is one of the dark triad.

But Ishtar came up and out screaming and yelling. Ugly.
And Tai said while I was present as Lisa, that there was a jewel left in my womb. And then suddenly I saw green long, oblong kind of emerald. And then I remembered as Lisa some other Hispanic healing I went through. Perhaps Santeria again or something.

Well after Ishtar was taken out and I went into demon voice again, demon presence, this tiny little voice said well I am Innanna. I  remember that name Inanna. They called her out and she, the demon, had a tiny little voice that’ssaid what am I going to do,  what am I going to do, you took my brother Ishtar. So they cast her out.

And still after this I was exhausted. And I was spaced. I was out of myself everything was unreal. I just wanted to drive home. I mean of course I didn’t really. I wanted comfort here with my friends but part of me still turned away. But it was late. It was raining. And it was raining in Louisville and I would get home after dark.
Not one bit of that decision made any sense. Ruby was fine until I got home in the morning. Bev was with her.

So I made a decision to stay and we went over to Andrea‘s house (she is so kind to me) and I went to bed. I think it was 4 o’clock and I didn’t move. And didn't wake up and really did not move. Not an inch nothing.
Did not move until 6 o’clock the next morning when I got up and left and drove home.
Feeling good.
And feeling better and better all the time. What a story.

It wasn't like me because it was demon spirits.