Blessed are the Peace Makers.

Not (just) the Peace Keepers.

Peace Makers.

So in my ongoing saga and journey of living with an alcoholic, and out of my depth for helping her, anticipating her, living with her - I find I have been consistently in my depth for loving her.

Wednesday night she was fall-down drunk and belligerent when I got home from Church. It was so heartbreaking to me. I left her on the porch, fallen, unsure of the liabilities, the true dangers, the actual next move to make.
I had a talk with Bev and she helped me be calm, and assured, and suggested I go peek in on her, and maybe just take a pillow and blanket.
No way did I think she would (be able to) get up on her own. Bleeding elbows and spilled drinks all over the brick porch.

When I did go back, she had gotten up and gone to bed.
I did not speak with her Thursday. I prayed and I worked. And I prayed more.

God, this is another thing, another trial, another internal conversation... I hand it to You. I lay it at Your feet. Quiet my mind and my heart. I know to love, but I do not always know what that looks like.

So this morning, Joanne was up early on the porch. Day 2.5 without alcohol. There is none in the house and she knows not to ask me to get it. The housekeeper gets it for her.
sigh.

I could immediately see she was so clear. I told her Ruby and I were coming out to visit.

Really, probably the first real "visit" we have had in 88 days here. We spoke of change, us leaving, how sad it makes her, and her drinking, and her options... and I said what a LIFE you have had. Build on it. Don't drop dead now. 
Anyway, the conversation was relevant.... but for my sharing here - it was the Holy Spirit bursting through me. I am high still, with no attachment to the outcome and her choice to work it out.
IF she were...not drunk..and so unpredictable - bad for me, bad for Ruby -  this is a great place for me to be. The suite of rooms, the privacy, the back greenery and quiet...

But God has provided me a new place. And perhaps the shock of truly moving... will be helpful to Joanne's journey. I promised her if she moved I would come and help her pack it up.
I promised her if there were slices of friendship to be honed that I would work at it, and visit when I come down this way.

And me, I am at peace. Even if there is another breakdown - highly likely in 7 days - I am at peace, right here, right now. I asked her several times, as I held her hand - remember this morning's visit. I am your ally. Remember what we have said.

Thank you God, for that exchange.
Thank you God, for letting me remember with You, I am whole.
Thank you God, for showing me the way to Be a PeaceMaker.

MATTHEW 5:9

New International Version
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

New Living Translation
God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God.

English Standard Version
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

Berean Standard Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

Berean Literal Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

King James Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

New King James Version
Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God.

New American Standard Bible
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

NASB 1995
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

NASB 1977
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

Legacy Standard Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

Amplified Bible
“Blessed [spiritually calm with life-joy in God’s favor] are the makers and maintainers of peace, for they will [express His character and] be called the sons of God.

Christian Standard Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

Holman Christian Standard Bible
The peacemakers are blessed, for they will be called sons of God.

American Standard Version
Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called sons of God.

Contemporary English Version
God blesses those people who make peace. They will be called his children!

English Revised Version
Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called sons of God.

GOD'S WORD® Translation
Blessed are those who make peace. They will be called God's children.

Good News Translation
"Happy are those who work for peace; God will call them his children!

International Standard Version
"How blessed are those who make peace, because it is they who will be called God's children!

NET Bible
"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the children of God.

New Heart English Bible
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the children of God.

Webster's Bible Translation
Blessed are the peace-makers: for they shall be called children of God.

Weymouth New Testament
"Blessed are the peacemakers, for it is they who will be recognized as sons of God.