Tiny Battles, Finished Victory

So busy. So tired much of the time. Fighting tiny battles in my tiny world.

And yet—I know. I do know—when I lift my eyes—that the battle is already done and won. Jesus has finished what I could never finish. (John 19:30; Colossians 2:14–15)

This day—this very moment—was seen by God, created by God, known by God, and filled with His purpose. For me. (Psalm 139:16; Isaiah 46:10)

Psalm 139:16
Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.

I haven’t stopped often to write lately, but I haven’t stopped talking to Him.

I’m overflowing with conversations with my Lord and Savior—walking me through those very skirmishes, teaching me in the middle of them, honing me again and again. I used to think refinement would feel like a harsh fire.

The Word is honest: we will be refined. (1 Peter 1:6–7; Malachi 3:3)

Malachi 3:3
He will sit as a refiner and a purifier of silver;
He will purify the sons of Levi,
And ^[a]purge them as gold and silver,
That they may offer to the Lord
An offering in righteousness.

But the tenderness of God has continued to surprise me.
Why do I deserve such tenderness?

Because now—sometimes right in the moment—I can feel the Holy Spirit inviting me to step aside. To surrender the urge to react.
To loosen my grip on outrage, temperament, and that sneaky kind of self-righteousness that pretends it’s “justice.”
And instead, to let Him respond through me with His grace. (Galatians 5:22–23; Proverbs 15:1)

Not perfectly. But noticeably.

Something is changing.

Proverbs 15:1
A soft answer turns away wrath,
But a harsh word stirs up anger.

And one of the sweetest gifts has been a day-to-day friend—someone engaged in the daily rhythm of my life—Ethan, who prays with me. Work. God. Friendship. Exploration.
We pray first.
We pray in the middle of it.
We pray when we repent and acknowledge what’s true.
We pray as often as needed—sometimes several times a day.
(1 Thessalonians 5:16–18; Philippians 4:6–7)

1Thessalonians 5:16-18
Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

This kind of prayer has been freeing me—is freeing me. It’s aligning me more and more with the Lord. Even more than the beautiful “beginning friends” God gave me—Teresa, Jerri, Andrea—who have loved me well.
We’re all walking.
But the daily companionship I longed for has become… present. Now. By default. Because Jesus is near, and because prayer keeps opening the door. And I love the companionship of Witness.(James 4:8; John 15:5)

James 4:8
Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

So writing hasn’t been the priority. The desire is still there, yes—but the priority has been living it: the conscious, minute-by-minute experience of walking with Jesus… or noticing when I’m not… and returning. (Psalm 23:3)

Psalm 23:3
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.

And when I do rest—when I open my Bible, or relax, or even watch something like The West Wing—I can see it: how much He has already changed me.

So how blessed am I?

Honestly, in the overflow of my life, I see it everywhere. My beautiful little compact living quarters—safe, elegant, welcoming. A home that feels like peace. (Psalm 4:8)

I have the money to enter a peptide class with world-class teachers—learning how to steward my health with wisdom and humility, under the Lord’s care. (3 John 1:2; 1 Corinthians 6:19–20)

So how blessed am I to have plenty?

3 John 1:2
Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.

I want to walk closer in gratitude every day.
To say it out loud. To boldly and readily share it without shame or fear:

It is all His. (James 1:17)

Everything I am.
Everything I can do.
Everything I can buy.
Everything I can give away.
Everything I can love.

James 1:17
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.

All is from Him.
And all I have is safest in His hands. (Romans 11:36; Proverbs 3:5–6)

And on the days I feel small—when the battles feel personal and exhausting—I’m learning to remember the truest thing:

The victory is not mine to manufacture.
It’s mine to receive.

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.

So I raise my eyes again—right here in this tiny world—and I choose joy, not because life is easy, but because Jesus is faithful. (Nehemiah 8:10; Romans 8:37–39)

• Nothing is random. Not this day, not this timing, not even the interruptions. God foresaw this moment—and He knew me before I ever arrived here. (Jeremiah 1:5; Psalm 139:1–4)

Jeremiah 1:5
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you;
Before you were born I sanctified you;
I ^[ordained you a prophet to the nations.”

• This day is purposeful because God made it—and because He has me breathing still today. Mercy is not abstract; it’s air in my lungs.
  (Psalm 118:24; Lamentations 3:22–23; Acts 17:25)

Lamentations 3:22–23
Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed,
Because His compassions fail not.
²³ They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.

• If I’m still here, it’s because He is still working. He is patient, precise, and present—finishing what He started in me. (Philippians 1:6)

Philippians 1:6
 being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ;

I am known—fully and tenderly.
I am held—securely and kindly.
I am refined—not to be crushed, but to be made pure and steady.
(Isaiah 43:1–2; 1 Peter 1:6–7)

God granted me this next day to honor Him—to walk with Him—to abide with Him—so I can bear fruit that looks like Him. (Micah 6:8; John 15:4–5; Galatians 5:22–23)

Today is not mine to control. It is mine to steward—moment by moment—by staying close to Jesus. (Proverbs 3:5–6)

ISAIAH 43:1-2
But now, thus says the Lord, who created you, O Jacob,
And He who formed you, O Israel:
“Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by your name;
You are Mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned,
Nor shall the flame scorch you.

Known. Held. Refined.
Not Random—Redeemed.  

^{Romans 8:28} And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

JEREMIAH 29:11
¹¹ For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.